Episode 42: 3 things that I would and wouldn't change about feeding my kids

Episode 42: 3 things that I would and wouldn't change about feeding my kids

In today's episode, I reflect on lessons learnt both a mum and a paediatric dietitian.

Feeding children can be quite a journey, filled with trials and triumphs. What I know now is very different from what I knew back when I started out as a paediatric dietitian pre kids!

In this episode, I'll be diving into three things I'd do differently if I could start over, and three things I'd definitely keep the same. It's all about learning from our experiences and making life easier for each other.

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Links
https://nourishwithkarina.com/feedingbabies
https://nourishwithkarina.com/3-week-feeding-kids-reset

Highlights:

Introduction (00:00.00)
Lessons Learned from Teaching Children (00:33.422)
Nourishing Kids: A One-stop Shop for Parents (02:49.504)
Parenting Tips for Toddlers(05:13.206)
Parental Influence on Children's Eating Habits (07:23.382)
Parenting Challenges and Solutions (09:49.612)
Pediatric Dietitian's Approach to Food Eating (12:11.084)
Parenting Tips for Children (14:26.552)
Family Eating and Connection(16:47.65)
Making Food Fun and Healthy for Children (19:09.954)
Setting Expectations for Colorful Lunches (21:30.952)
Podcast Summary (23:46.636)

Show notes

READ TRANSCRIPT

Show Notes

In today's episode, I reflect on lessons learnt both a mum and a paediatric dietitian.

Feeding children can be quite a journey, filled with trials and triumphs. What I know now is very different from what I knew back when I started out as a paediatric dietitian pre kids!

Key Points of Discussion:

Avoiding Food Talk at the Table: Learn how reducing food-related conversations can help alleviate mealtime stress and encourage a more relaxed environment.
Keeping an Open Mind: Discover the benefits of offering a variety of foods and approaching meals with a positive mindset.
Persistence with New Foods: Find out why it’s crucial to keep presenting new foods to your kids, even if they initially reject them.
Eating Together: Understand the significance of family mealtimes for fostering healthy eating habits and family bonding.
Making Food Fun: Explore creative ways to involve your kids in food preparation and make healthy eating enjoyable.

Whether you're a mum or a dad, this episode is packed with practical advice and personal stories to help you navigate the ups and downs of feeding your little ones.

For more recipes and feeding tips, check out my website: Nourish with Karina . Let's make mealtimes easier and more enjoyable for everyone!

Introduciton(00:01.326)
You're listening to the Easy Feed Podcast, episode number 42, three things that I would and wouldn't change about feeding my kids. Hi there, I'm Karina Savage and with over 20 years experience feeding children, including my own, I've learnt all the secrets that busy mums need to get their children eating better and actually enjoying healthy foods. So a huge welcome to the Easy Feed Podcast.

Lessons Learned from Teaching Children (00:33.422)
Hi guys, I hope you're really well. Thanks for tuning in today. I am wanting today to share with you lessons learnt from me. I mean, look, my kids are only 10 and 12 now. They're not exactly adults, but I just wanted to share things that I would do differently if I had my time again, because really that's what it's about. It's about

learning from our mistakes, sharing with each other. And I'm here to try to give you as much information as possible to make your life easier feeding children. So look, you know, when I went to uni a whole, a while, not a whole, it was a long time ago now. It makes me feel old. I was good. when did I go to uni? It spread 24 years ago now. And what we learned back then about managing fussy eaters, well, to be honest with you, we didn't really do much pediatrics.

When you do nutrition and dietetics, you predominantly do adult stuff, which certainly was back then. And then you specialised in paediatrics after your degree. Well, I did two degrees. I did a sports science degree and then I did a nutrition, dietetics degree. And you really didn't do much paediatrics until placement and then after. But even, you know, what I learnt along the way there was really the cookie cutter stuff. was like repeated exposure and, and stuff that.

sometimes worked, but I do distinctly remember sitting in clinics. I worked for 10 years in a children's hospital and I would, you know, see patients on the wards and you know, that's when I fell in love with the gastroenterology side of things and kids with really weird and wonderful gut issues. But as part of my role, I would also do a clinic on, just a general clinic and I would see so many parents with fuzzy eaters. And you'd go through the session and you'd get to the end of the session and you'd

maybe book a three month review, but my heart always sank when I booked that review because I just knew that nothing was really going to change much. And that sounds terrible, but it, you know, I was doing the best I could. It was a free service. Literally there was nothing more I could tell these parents. What I know now isn't what I knew then and now fast forward.

Nourishing Kids: A One-stop Shop for Parents (02:49.504)
I'm a parent as well, but I have done a lot of learning and a lot of thinking over the years. And that's what's led me to create Nourishing Kids, which is basically my one stop shop for helping parents feed their kids more easily and managing fussy eating, feeding babies, basically your one stop shop to know how to best nourish your child. But I couldn't have got to that point unless I'd started somewhere. But what I learned back then was very different to what I do now and what I would

have done now. So that's why I'm here to share my learnings and my experiences with you, not only as a pediatric dietician of 22 years, but as a mum as well. Because I think back then when I was giving advice, I wasn't a parent. And I think it's very different when you've lived it yourself, when you've lived Fussy Eaters, when you've lived the chaos of, you know, dinnertime, when you've lived having, you know, that morning lunchbox daily grind. So

And when you've lived it, then you can truly relate to fellow parents, fellow mums and dads too. I'm not discounting dads. It's just that my, they're the ship and my, you know, my focus is moms, but absolutely give dads all the credit where due as well, because sometimes the mum is the full -time, you know, breadwinner worker and dad is the one who's at home managing everything. And so I do feel bad sometimes I don't include dads enough. So I apologize for that.

But yeah, I just wanted to give you, guess, my insights to my experiences and how I would do things differently as a mum. If I were to start now and have babies again now, and that is not happening, but every now and again, when I have a baby that I have a consult with or, well, I consult with the mum, but I see these gaudy little babies, I'm like, I could have another one. Anyway.

Let's not go down that path. But yeah, so I wanted today to share with you three things that I would do again and three things that I wouldn't do again. So why don't we start with, I guess, you know, the, the bad things, the things that I wouldn't do again. So three things that I wouldn't do again, if I could start over again, rub it all out and my daughter was just born.

Parenting Tips for Toddlers(05:13.206)
And hopefully she wasn't as chucky as she was. my gosh, my daughter was the chuckiest baby ever. Thank goodness we had floorboards back then. I tell you, the amount of tolerance you develop for vomit is next level when you have a chucky baby. It's just incredible. So I mean, yeah, look, I wouldn't change it.

She is what she, she was what she was, and she usually, is that. Well, I mean, if we could change the vomit, wouldn't be a bad thing, but I'll, I'll take it she is. anyhow, if I was to change things and my daughter was, you know, back in the, in the Chucky stages and we were about to start solids, then what I would do differently as she was becoming that sort of fussy toddler is I would not talk about food at all at the table. So that would be my number one.

I would not talk about food at all at the table because by doing so over the years, I think without realising, we do place an emphasis on the healthy foods and we do subconsciously put pressure on. We don't even realise we're doing it, but we do. We put pressure on. And for that reason, if we can make a bit more of a rule with ourselves that we just don't talk about food at all.

It can make for a much smoother, happier meal time experience whereby you're connecting more. You're connecting more with your family. You're connecting more with your kids. You're not focusing on that bite of broccoli or what they are or aren't eating and they're pushing the carrots around the plate, but they're hoovering their pasta. So, you know,

That's something that I did with my daughter and then it becomes a thing, right? And then the more it becomes a thing, the more it becomes a thing and then the more they don't need it. And so if I was to give you my number one is, well, one of my top three is I would not talk about food at all as much as possible. I mean, it's so hard not to talk about food, but I would do my damnedest to not talk about food because

Parental Influence on Children's Eating Habits (07:23.382)
As soon as you start going down that path without realising, you show them how much you want them to eat something in particular. You start placing more positive and negative connotations on food. You say, can you get through, can you please eat the veggies first before you eat the pasta or the meat? Or maybe you want them to eat the meat, but you start making all these rules up without realising around food. But food is just food and food should be enjoyed and we should be focusing on just

having a calm, happy environment where kids just enjoy meal times with the family and they learn to love food that way. Cause kids learn to like foods that are familiar to them. And if children are seeing their parents eating and they're happy and you know, it's just a fun environment, then they're much more likely to just pop that bit of broccoli in their mouth as well. Whereas what I've tended to do would be more to focus on work.

she was or wasn't eating and then talk about it. And then that creates a thing. And the more you create a thing, as I said, the more it becomes a thing. And so that would be my number one. Okay. So don't talk about food. If you can, if you can do it, don't talk about food. That makes sense. Number two, I would try to come to the table with an open mind because I honestly feel like some of the time I came to the table.

And I'd already written off the food or the meal before she'd even had a chance to eat it. And that's because in my mind, I'd made a story up that she wasn't going to eat it. And so maybe my vibe was off. If you want to talk, you go a bit woo woo and talk about energy and you know, your subconscious body language or your cues, your body cues, because if you've come to the table already feeling defeated, the way you talk about food, the way you act.

They're going to pick up on that and perhaps they may play into that. don't know. It depends on your child and their personality, but I feel like often I would write off the meal before she'd even come to the table like, you're not going to eat that. And sometimes you wouldn't even put it on the plate, right? Because you're like, you're not going to eat that. I'm not even going to bother. So I think if I could have come to the table with a more open mindset about what she may or may not try.

Parenting Challenges and Solutions (09:49.612)
then I would probably have put more options on her plate rather than just give her what I thought she would eat because I just wanted her to eat because she was a bit on the skinny side and you felt pressure and you felt judgment and you'd compare to others and you know, all those things that you do that you don't want to do, but you do because you can't help it because you just care about your child and you love them and you want them to be healthy. And so, my God, it's such a mess, isn't it? Like we just.

wind ourselves up into such a mess, but it's because we just want our kids to be healthy and thrive. So we end up coming to the table thinking, she's not going to eat that again. Well, I did. And that's what I would try to do differently. That would be my number two. I would try not to come to the table or I would actually try to maybe offer more variety with the mindset that she might try it. She might like it rather than just giving her.

the deconstructed pasta protein of their jeez and like knowing in my mind that she wasn't going to eat the protein. That's sort of the mindset I had and that wasn't helpful, but I can understand why I came to the table with that mindset. And I, I see it all the time. It still happens. It's so common, but I would try to change that next time because if I had a more positive mindset around, she might like, you know, tuna this time, I would probably have put it on her plate more.

And then I would probably, hopefully been more relaxed about it. And if I went with number one as well, then I wouldn't have talked about it. And if I was enjoying it in front of her, she may have just eaten it. And my gosh, how much better would that have been? So having a more open mindset, throwing more foods at her. Like I look at my brother and the way he's raising his little one, she's a fabulous eater and they just throw anything at her and she eats it.

And she's also in my mom's care a couple of days a week while they're working. mom, mom's an amazing cook. She's grown up with an Italian household and she throws everything at her as well. And she eats so well. And, and that's just such a different mindset. It's like, yeah, we're eating it. You're going to eat it. You can eat it. And rather than thinking, is she going to eat it? You know, walking on eggshells. It's just such a different mindset, but it works.

Pediatric Dietitian's Approach to Food Eating (12:11.084)
And she's such a great eater and they're very relaxed about food and yeah, they throw anything at her. So I think if I was to do it again, I would try and be much more relaxed around food. And it's ironic, right? Cause I'm the one that's the pediatric dietitian, he works in environmental science and it's, yeah, it's just so different your approach, but you know, maybe that was my downfall. Maybe I knew too much and so maybe I'd seen too much. I...

was already going into it with the concerns that she might be fussing. of course, then she was, manifested it, right? But then I need to help myself and go, you know what, it's at least 30 % of kids out there anyway. So, that's my number two. That's what I would do differently. I would not talk about food and I would try to come to the table with an open mind and therefore probably offer her more variety.

And number three, I would keep offering the food despite the knockbacks because I know full well that she would refuse things a couple of times. And then I'd be like, she doesn't like tuna. I'm not going to offer it anymore. I still remember making her a potato salmon bake and she didn't like it. And I was like, I'm not going to offer her that anymore. And then I might've offered her salmon once more, you know, three or six months later. And then that was probably it. And I, again, I made up the story. She doesn't like it. Do you know what? She hadn't even had a...

proper chance to learn to like it. Kids, babies and kids, I mean, you've heard it all that, well, you may have heard that. And this is one thing I did know back then when I'm pre -kids, when I was working in children's hospital, you know, babies and young children need to be exposed to foods at least 15 times, or it's actually probably try foods 15 times, taste them 15 times before they may accept them. But, you know, often we write off the food after a couple of refusals. And so that was my...

Third downfall, and again, you know, can't be too hard on yourself because there's no real feeding kids Bible, which is what I'm trying to create for you. But yeah, like it's definitely something that I would do differently because offering her more exposure to a food will have increased her familiarity and trust in that food and then acceptance. And do you know what? She still doesn't eat tuna because I didn't give it to her enough.

Parenting Tips for Children (14:26.552)
Whereas my son actually eats tuna and I know kids are different and it's actually surprising he likes tuna to be honest with you because what happened and this also often happens is when number one doesn't like a food and then number two comes along, you're so burned by number one that you don't even give number two enough exposure. And my poor son probably didn't get tuna hardly ever because I'd already given up on it with my daughter.

But he actually likes it. I'm like, he could have had tuna so much more early on and you know, it's rich in amigas. And again, there's the guilt, right? Food guilt. It's terrible. It's terrible, but it's so real. So, you know, that's what I would do differently. I would keep offering despite the knockbacks. And then when my son came along, I would try to keep going with those foods, even though she refused them because then

He gets the exposure, right? So if you have a little one, or you've got two little ones, try to keep up the exposure rather than stop offering it and just giving them what they'll eat on their plate. Because I do see that with children that are only offered what they are going to eat, then they do start to narrow, narrow, narrow, narrow the intake and start flicking off foods left, right and center. And the parents are left with, my gosh, plain pasta, plain rice.

crackers, the white beige dye, that's it. So it is important to try and keep that exposure up. Even if it's just a little bit of that food, just try to keep it up because that helps to stretch them over time. Okay, let's move on to three things that I wouldn't change because I did do some things, right? My training has to count for something and you know, my

Hopefully I'm semi -intelligent enough to sort of work a few things out on my own. Anyway, so three things that I would do again is I would continue to eat with the children. That is something that I've been very firm on and I'm really happy to say that it's something that we cherish. We cherish meal times together. So I would definitely work, you know, I actually miss it when we don't have family meal times together. So if my husband's working late or

Family Eating and Connection(16:47.65)
You know, one child's out at sport and you know, the, evening's very messy and we don't come together. I actually miss it. Now when my kids were really little, like, you know, two and four, three and five, four and six, often my husband wouldn't get home until quite late. So I would be the one to always sit at the little IKEA table with my knees up and them either side of me eating with them. But I've always made a point of eating with them. And you know, it meant that my husband didn't.

get to eat with me, which isn't great, but it's more important, I think, in those early years that you are eating with your children and they see you eating those foods. And yes, we had slightly different things in our plate sometimes, but I tried to have it similar as much as possible because it's really important that they see you eating good foods. And that helps, that very much helps to build that familiarity and trust and they will learn to like those foods to one day.

It may not be as early or quick as you would like. And that's where I do, you know, talk about a lot about lowering expectations, but it's really important that you are eating with your child. at least one parent with the children. And that's something that I definitely would do again. And I still do it now. Like we still eat together and it's wonderful. And it's, you know, we talk about the day we have laughs, we connect. It's, it's a really important time to connect.

Really, that's the only time in our day when we come together as a family. The rest of the day, we're all rushing about. So if you can carve out 15, 20 minutes, I mean, sometimes kids won't sit at the table that long, but for as long as I'll stay there, just try and have some sort of connection family time where you don't talk about food, you just talk about life and each other and connect. So I think that's really valuable and I definitely wouldn't change that. I would do that again and I'm going to continue to do that. The second thing that I'm...

proud of is that I've tried to keep it fun and get them involved in food as much as possible. You know, I've got memories of my son as a little one sitting in the trolley of the supermarket munching on a macadamia or munching on a snow pea sprout that he might've tried, tried to get kids peeling peas and my son's still blessed, he's still...

Making Food Fun and Healthy for Children (19:09.954)
grabs a piece of capsicum and comes over to me and squirts me with the capsicum juice. You didn't know how many times I've been squirted with capsicum juice. But you know, it's making food fun. One time we made mouth guards out of capsicum chunks and you know, they love red capsicum and red capsicum is so good for you. And it's because we made it fun, I believe, that has really developed the love of capsicum. And look, you can make food fun in all different ways, whether it's

you know, as a fun food activity, whether it's them helping you bake food or cut herbs into pizza scrolls or a whole lot of different things you can do to make food fun. but making food fun is something that I think has really helped my children develop a love for some of these foods that I really want them to eat. So the healthy foods and, and I definitely will continue to do that. And I'm glad that I've done that because I think it's really helped.

The third thing that I would not change and I will continue to do as well is put colour in their lunchbox. Now this is a, something that I've done right from the day dot and I look back at my children's preschool lunchboxes or kindy lunchboxes, depending what state you're in. And they were really, really colourful, really loaded with colour, lots of fruits, lots of vegetables. And, and I've continued to do that. And I think it's really helped them get used to eating.

a lot of plant foods, a lot of colour throughout the day, not just, you know, at breakfast or at dinner time. And that helps take the pressure off dinner, right? It helps take the pressure off how many vegetables I've got to eat at dinner if they've eaten veggies throughout the day. So I've been pretty firm on always putting veggies in the lunchbox. Whether they've eaten them or not is a different story. And I've gotten better over the years at saying, well, eat these for afternoon tea and have your afternoon tea as well.

You don't want to waste those veggies. And as kids get older, they say no more often. And so I find that the amount of vegetables that you can put in the lunchbox may reduce over time because then they see all their friends eating, you know, muffins from Woolies or chicken crimpies. And then they start saying, well, I want more of those. But if you can keep putting veggies in, at least a couple of veggies in.

Setting Expectations for Colorful Lunches (21:30.952)
every day at lunchtime, if they don't eat them, them for afternoon tea. think having that expectation, setting that sort of ground rule that there's always going to be colour in their lunchbox is very beneficial because they generally do eat some of it and if not, they eat it for afternoon tea. But it's just teaching them that colour is a part of their life. This is what healthy eating is. And it's that subconscious program in a way that

This is a part of a healthy lunch. You get your sandwich, you get your crackers, you get your biscuit or whatever, and you also get lots of colorful plant foods. So that's definitely something that I wouldn't change. I'm happy that I've done that and I will continue to do that. yeah, sometimes my kids don't eat all their veggies and I'll say, on, have some for afternoon tea, please. Or worst case, they get moved from the lunchbox onto their dinner plate. I think my son's once eaten a bit of carrot in the shower.

Not at the moment though, because he's got five wobbly teeth and so carrots are off the cards. Although he probably should eat them because it's going to help his teeth come out. But he said to me this morning, no apple please. And I think carrots, and last night he was like, no carrots please. So I think he's worried about his teeth coming out. But yeah, bless last night. He came home from school with a little pocket. I lost a tooth at school today. A little like paper.

What would you call it? A little paper envelope, tiny little paper envelope with his little teeth in it and a little cute little sign that said, lost a tooth today on the front. And, and so, yeah, think carrots and apples are off the cards at the moment. But anyway, that's okay. It's all part of it. But I think, you know, at the end of the day, any color that you can get in the lunchbox is better than none. And if you can get them to eat it after school or on the dinner plate, if they haven't eaten it, at least it's getting in at some point. So.

I think if you can do that and almost set the expectation that that's just a part of their lunch, whether they eat it at, you know, crunch, sit, morning tea, lunch. It really doesn't matter as long as it's getting in and they have that expectation that colour is a part of their life. So that's what I would not change. So my three things that I would change, I would not talk about food anymore. I would come to the table with an open mind and I would keep offering the food despite the knockback.

Podcast Summary (23:46.636)
So, you know, not giving up and the three things that I am happy that I've done that I will continue doing is eating together, making food fun and adding colour into their lunchbox. So there's my little three things that I would change and three things that I wouldn't change. I hope that's been helpful for you and please leave me a review. I'd love you to leave me a review so we can get this podcast out to more mums.

If you're a busy mum and you need more feeding kids inspiration, then please consider joining Nourishing Kids. You can find out all the information on my website, nourishwithkarina .com forward slash membership. Nourishing Kids is a place where you will learn exactly how to set up an effective plan. It's not time consuming. You've got me holding your hand along the way. Basically it just gets your kids eating better without the food pressure and bribes.

Navission Kids is a place where we catch up fortnightly on a Q &A. You've got access to all my online information and member only recipes. And we have an awesome private Facebook group where we chat daily. yeah, head to my website to find out more information. It's currently open for new members. So I would love to connect with you and help you more on the inside in relation to feeding your family. And that's it for me. Bye for now. I'll see you next week.